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Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Dainty dumplings dangling in doorways

Too many questions, topography is one.

'Where is my damnable topography map for the sake of Jupiter and Mars!'

Grandiose explanations for lackadaisical happenings.

Embroidered stories, to stop the horror.

What was that I said the other day? Am I crazy? Is everyone I see every day crazy? Acting sane we are. Are we playing the part well enough? Is the reason we admire good actors because they are the best at that which all of humanity do everyday? Yes.

Direction is the really crazy one, the real life directors, away from films, those who direct others in everyday life, for they are after all what gives the 'film director' their title. Ability to direct, or compulsion to direct, to compel others to do. These things denote a type of craziness that goes far beyond that of the average person trying to conceal their real self.It can be quite lovely, everyone, everything, is intriguing. Where would we be without directors? They are brilliant, as are all those people and things that can move you emotionally. We are carbon based life forms after all. Shine on you crazy diamond.

Theatre of imaginings. Totem.

The brain. The mind, the psyche.

Twisted conundrums, wasted illusory peace. Sweet rest.

Awakened panic, slow, deliberate reality sliding in from somewhere, yes, I am alright.
That sun/rain feels delightful on my brow, how sweet it is to lie beneath this canopy of galaxies.

Serendipitous meetings encouraged by academic or economic yearnings.

Crouch low when you strike a high strength ultra meshed steel fence rusted at the bottom in the courtyard of the high security wing. I did so once many years ago to escape from a so-called 'high' security psychiatric facility, and the elation that accompanied it was quite exquisite, there was literally no other way out of that particular ward. Most efforts at escape were on visits to the 'open-side' or when I was moved there. Plus whenever I made escapes I was still 'crazy', not quite under the yolk of the psych drugs just yet.

Looking out at the world from in there.

I said to myself 'They are the ones who are crazy'. Lunatics, moon moved, everyone of us, bodies of water, tidal emotions...

Some of the safest moments of my life were in those crazy walls. But also some of the bleakest. Enriching it was.

To some I would recommend it. Though of course, it is rather odd.

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